I am 33 and still keep changing my life goals. I think this might be a problem. I have thought time and again that I knew, finally knew where my life was going, but then time and time again a wrench get thrown in the gears and things change.Well, ladies and gentlemen, I realized this week that I am not rid of that wrench. I divorced that wrench and not I can truly plan my life and know that I will be able to do it without anyone telling me why I can't.
This freedom is a little scary. Now I am the only one who is responsible for any screw ups. When you are young those screw ups are not too risky, but I am a mom now, I have to be sure about this.
I have decided to lay out my plan here so that I have no choice but to stick to it. So, here it is:
Nursing School. I wanted to do that when I was pregnant with Lily, but we didn't want to take the time and money to do it and then I just got lost in the stay at home mom gig. When I did finish my BA I took the fastest and cheapest track. It was good and I am glad I did it, but really there is not a lot I can do with a BA in Liberal Arts. I love my job now, but to make more money or to move to another library I would have to my Masters. I have thought this over. Now that I am a single mom I have to really think about that. And what it comes down to is that I can make as much money starting out as a nurse as I would making the most as a librarian around here. So, the decision was easy really.
The hard part comes next. How do I go to school and support my kids? Well, that's easy and hard at the same time. I can get school done really fast if I just go full time and don't work. Don't work? Really? That's right folks, I am taking the next two years off of work to go to school full time. Scary? YES!!! I am told that I can get enough loans to cover living expenses. Man, I am going to have a lot to pay off!!
So right now I am applying to Fairfield University and Quinnipiac University. The plan is to move down to New Haven this summer. There is a really great magnet school in New Haven so that is the area I am looking to live, but Milford, Stratford, Fairfield, Hamden and Shelton are in the running as well. Hernan works in Stratford so this is good for him too. And I will work my school schedule around the kids' so that we don't need day care. (This will only work for the first year since the second year will have me working at clinicals all of the time.)
So, there you go! Imagine me living in an old victorian house that has been changed into apartments and studying 24/7 for the next two years. Then imagine me working as a nurse full-time (but only 3 days a week!) in two years. I really am excited about it. I know I will love it. The clinicals might be hard, I really an NOT looking forward to ICU (colostomy bags, ewwww). Right now my first choice of specialty is labor and delivery, surgery is my second.
So, guys, am I nuts? I do have to take the kids away from the only place they really know. And I may struggle even more financially than I do now. Is it worth it?
11 comments:
You already know how I feel about the whole situation! I love those girls very much.....
UPDATE:
I did leave out that I won't know anyone down there so that adds to the scariness.
My friend Steph is like family for the girls and I and leaving her is going to break my heart.
It's only an hour away, but in CT that might as well be 5, especially in the winter.
Wow, big plans! Of course it's worth it, if it's what you really want to do. Changing careers and going back to school is a HUGE step but if anyone can do it I know you can! Good luck, Laurie!
All I know for sure is that time passes no matter what you do with it, so you may as well take the plunge and be somewhere better in two years. My mom did it with all seven of us kids at home, Shandolynne is doing it, you can do it! Any sacrifice you make now will be worth it in the long run.
You can absolutely do it. I'm thinking I have to go back to school as well...probably to get a therapist license of some kind since my BA is in Psych. But, it is SOOOO scary!!!! You can do it Lauri-I can totally see it working for you.
Lauri, nursing is a great idea, schedules are fairly flexible and you can get a job generally speaking anywhere with good pay. Some things you definitely want to think about (and I'm sure Shandy can tell you better) is that your training is going to sometimes be tedious and have more to do with bed pans and depressing issues then super fun, exciting stuff -- that being said I think that's true for anything, the getting through the boring schooling, tedious part so you can get the real job that you want. Also, as a former college advisor (and unfortunately an expert on college loans which won't be paid back until my child is like 25 or something) make sure you pay attention to your taxes from 2009 as this is what your FAFSA will be based on for the 2010-2011 school year and it's extremely difficult to change it to anything else, so your extra money as a singe mom may not start until AFTER you do your taxes for 2010 & for the school year starting 2011-2012. That being said, I know that my former/sort of current sister-in-law said her money takes care of all her tuition plus she gets extra money (but I'm also pretty sure she had to take out loans the first year because of her tax status the year before) - she's graduating this May with her RN degree.
Sara,
I checked about the tax thing and found out that I can provide my divorce decree to show that I now have only one income and I filled out my fafsa with only my own financial info. But I know it wont all be in aid... I will have to take loans. The question is how much will I need in loans? That is the worrisome part.
As for school I am not looking forward to some parts, but only 2 years, and really only a year of the clinical stuff and I am done. That will be good.
About loans to live on...Neil and I had to do this during his MBA since I was on bedrest that whole year and couldn't work. We applied for every grant we could to pay for tuition and books, and then we took out a Stafford (if i remember right) unsubsidized loan every three months. We scrutinized our bills to see how much we could live on, and then we applied for only that much. I think it worked out to about $5000 every three months, but that was just for the two of us, and it was tight. If we didn't have enough grants to pay for tuition we did the subsidized loans to pick up the slack. You can apply for larger lump sums with the unsubsidized, up to $100,000 I think for a graduate degree, but we didn't want to borrow any more than we needed. We had friends who did the lump sum and really wished they hadn't!
It's actually over 100,000 total for a graduate degree, but you can't get that all at once - Eli has literally been in grad/Phd school since 1999 (and he's just about to hit his limit) & they give you a certain amount a year (I believe the most you can get as a grad student is 26,500 a year and undergrad is less), split it by semester or quarters & then you can choose to just take all that they offer each term (for loans) or take a specific amount that you want. For undergrad they will sometimes split the amount between subsidized & unsubsidized, in which case you should take the most in sub & less in unsub if you can which just means that it won't start accruing interest until after your grace period after you graduate. You should definitely look into any kind of scholarships and state & federal & local & anywhere else you can find grants. You may also be able to get a personal school loan directly from a bank, but generally, the federal ones have the best interest rates. I don't know what schools you are applying to, but you know, since you already have a bachelor's and only need the RN certification, you don't have to go to a four year school, which could make your tuition a LOT cheaper.
Thanks guys.
I will only need to take out money for 2 years. With cost of living up here, though, I will need about 35k just for living expenses. And all three schools I am applying to are expensive.
Sara, even though I have a BA, I still have to transfer into a BSN program. They pay you more if you have that than if you just have your RN certification. It would take me just as long to get certified so I figured I might as well get the degree too.
Thank you, Sara. I couldn't remember exactly how the 100k was broken down. Our friends took three years to finish the MBA, and took the maximum allowed each semester (even though they didn't need it) so that they could take vacations and rent a house instead of an apartment. They ended up with almost $70k in unnecessary debt.
Best of luck, Lauri. Don't take out a loan so you can take a vacation, as much as you might need one! ha!
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