Why I Love Winter

 

 Isn't that picturesque? Snow just seems magical. 

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The reality!

Did I have you fooled? Did you really think that I loved winter? Because the thing is, I DON'T!!!! I hate it. It's cold and wet and dirty and there is salt and sand everywhere. Blecht!

The last few days have been unseasonably warm and we had some rain so most of the snow had melted. This morning...more snow. It was a wet slushy snow. A really good snow for snow ball fights. That's about the only thing that kind of snow is good for. It took me over 45 minutes to make a commute that is usually under 20 minutes. 

I left work early today. The snow had stopped and the sun came out, but the temp was hovering around 34 so I knew once the sun went down it would all freeze up. When I got home the sun was going down, the snow was starting again and they were plowing the parking lot. 

About an hour and a half later I had to go outside. I had garbage to take out and had left the cat food in the car. The snow was gone. The sky was clear. The moon was almost full. It looked beautiful. The wind was also blowing like a hurricane! There was at least 2 inches in the very short time on the parking lot. I was slipping all over the place going to the dumpster. The temperature has dropped so much that the snow was really powdering. A really good snow for skiing. That's about the only thing that kind of snow is good for. I am not looking forward to cleaning off my car tomorrow. I can only hope the high winds will blow it clean. 

Don't be jealous!

Life Plans

I am 33 and still keep changing my life goals. I think this might be a problem. I have thought time and again that I knew, finally knew where my life was going, but then time and time again a wrench get thrown in the gears and things change.Well, ladies and gentlemen, I realized this week that I am not rid of that wrench. I divorced that wrench and not I can truly plan my life and know that I will be able to do it without anyone telling me why I can't.

This freedom is a little scary. Now I am the only one who is responsible for any screw ups. When you are young those screw ups are not too risky, but I am a mom now, I have to be sure about this.

I have decided to lay out my plan here so that I have no choice but to stick to it. So, here it is:

Nursing School. I wanted to do that when I was pregnant with Lily, but we didn't want to take the time and money to do it and then I just got lost in the stay at home mom gig. When I did finish my BA I took the fastest and cheapest track. It was good and I am glad I did it, but really there is not a lot I can do with a BA in Liberal Arts. I love my job now, but to make more money or to move to another library I would have to my Masters. I have thought this over. Now that I am a single mom I have to really think about that. And what it comes down to is that I can make as much  money starting out as a nurse as I would making the most as a librarian around here. So, the decision was easy really.

The hard part comes next. How do I go to school and support my kids? Well, that's easy and hard at the same time. I can get school done really fast if I just go full time and don't work. Don't work? Really? That's right folks, I am taking the next two years off of work to go to school full time. Scary? YES!!! I am told that I can get enough loans to cover living expenses. Man, I am going to have a lot to pay off!!

So right now I am applying to Fairfield University and Quinnipiac University. The plan is to move down to New Haven this summer. There is a really great magnet school in New Haven so that is the area I am looking to live, but Milford, Stratford, Fairfield, Hamden and Shelton are in the running as well. Hernan works in Stratford so this is good for him too. And I will work my school schedule around the kids' so that we don't need day care. (This will only work for the first year since the second year will have me working at clinicals all of the time.)

So, there you go! Imagine me living in an old victorian house that has been changed into apartments and studying 24/7 for the next two years. Then imagine me working as a nurse full-time (but only 3 days a week!) in two years. I really am excited about it. I know I will love it. The clinicals might be hard, I really an NOT looking forward to ICU (colostomy bags, ewwww). Right now my first choice of specialty is labor and delivery, surgery is my second.

So, guys, am I nuts? I do have to take the kids away from the only place they really know. And I may struggle even more financially than I do now. Is it worth it?

A confession and a complaint

Confession:
I have an online dating profile. There are some winners and some losers, but in this day and age it is the only way to meet adults to date.

Complaint:
There is a section on my site where you can write a post and others can comment on it. I asked about my profile. I wanted to know how others would change what I had written. Most comments are helpful. Some are unrealistic (mentioning I have kids will scare people away). One has me very angry.

Basically, the gist of his message was this:
 He started out ok. He said that vagueness 'works best for cute female profiles.' I thought that maybe he meant I was cute. Then he said that if you are 'less attractive then [sic] you need to be far more specific.' Well, maybe he was being general and not talking about me. BUT, then he said that I am so vague it 'reeks of bodies in the closet.'

Is this guy saying that I am not attractive? And did he really have to go there? For the record I have added here the picture I have up. I think I look nice.

OMG LOL LMAO WTF FTW BRB ROFL

Ok, some of you know that I am prone to use a lot of text speak. I have been thinking about this lately. And I feel a little silly about it. I also feel guilty since some of these (OMG, LMAO, and WTF) have swears in them. *If you don't know what these mean, look them up, I am not telling.*

I want to let you know that when I use these, I really don't think about the actual words, they kind of take the place of the words and it really never bothered me that I used them so much. What got me thinking about this though is when I was at my grandmother's funeral. My mother printed out my blog post from Christmas Eve for the preacher to read at the funeral. She had to black out the OMG I wrote. I felt bad that I had embarrassed her like that.

In addition, I feel like LOL and BRB are crutches to most people. And maybe I should grow up and try to use real words. I type really fast, so why do I need these?

So, I hereby announce that I will try to wean myself from using these. Those of you who chat online with  me are free to call me on it when I use one. I invite you all to join me in this new practice of using the English language.

One note: I do NOT promise not to use then in texting, though, I will try to only use the ones without swear words (LOL, FTW, BRB, ROFL). I also do not vow to use proper capitalization or punctuation in chat or text. That is just too much to ask without my Blackberry that did it for me. And my emoticons? They are here to stay.

Romance: Is it really all it's cracked up to be?

I think I have realized, in a sudden light bulb moment, that I am not at all romantic. I always knew I was not as romantic as most women, but I thought there was some desire to be swept off my feet. No. There really isn't.
I learned this because I was recently in a situation that would have made for a perfect romantic movie moment, but instead of being swept away, which in all rights I should have been, I was annoyed.

This has caused me to really question what kind of person I am. Is there something wrong with me? Who wouldn't want for their life to be a movie. The only thing missing was the soaring music. Well, I don't know if I have something wrong or not, you be the judge. I do know that romantic gestures are just not my thing.

Take for example one of my all time favorite movies: Say Anything

But, you know what? If this (see above) happened to me now, I would be thinking, "Great, now Dad is gonna be mad and the neighbors are going to call the cops, and I was in the middle of Grey's Anatomy on DVR!"

Maybe not, but that is what I think I might think.

And what of other romantic scenes? I looked up the top most romantic scenes online. The two that were in pretty much any list have never, NEVER, appealed to me. The whole pottery scene in Ghost? Eww, just too messy. And Titanic? Just not romantic at all really (well about as romantic as Romeo and Juliet, but if you actually read the play you know its NOT romantic in the least), but the scene over the bow of the ship? Are you trying to get killed? Get off of there!!!

There are a few movie moments that I find appealing: when Rhett brings Scarlett a new hat from Paris while she is in mourning and tells her she needs a real kiss and then proceeds to demonstrate. Now that is good stuff. But the scene from that movie most people go on about is when he carries her up the stairs in a fury. Sorry, people, rape (even marital rape) is just not on my list of romantic interludes I wish to experience.

Another favorite movie of mine is It's a Wonderful Life and the scene where they are talking on the phone to a friend and he starts shaking her and telling her he doesn't want her or a career in plastics and then they kiss passionately, I always loved that scene. But now I am thinking about that and I have to tell you, I would be right angry at him for that. I think I would have slapped him. 

So, tell me. What are your favorite romantic movie scenes? Think them over and tell me, would you go for it in real life? Are any of you out there really true romantics? Am I an aberration? Please share. And don't hold back.